relationships and the bedroom

News flash…sticking your fingers in there just isn't going to do the job!

Read below for some tips on how to get her off with your finger.

•First, show her you are a hygienic individual and give your hands a thorough washing. She isn't going to want your gritty hands in her.

•Set the mood and start by kissing her and touching her all over. This is more likely to get her aroused. Lightly rub your hands all around her body. Rub her breasts, stomach, up and down her legs, and then slowly work your way to her vagina.

•Keep teasing her by gently rubbing your hands all over her. Get started with some lubricant or cream. The Nipple and Clit Stimulating Gel is fantastic as it heightens sensitivity around the vaginal area and it also makes it easier to insert your fingers into her vagina.

•Gently rub all over her clitoris and vagina. Remember to keep paying attention to the clitoris as this is the golden spot with most girls. Keep using lube, as the coolness of it makes the area even more sensitive, and your hands will gradually keep absorbing what you initially put on.

•Gently rub up and down the clitoris. Circular motions are also good. Keep kissing her at the same time.

•Move your fingers down to her vagina. Slowly insert one finger in. You may want to put some more lube on her or your finger at this stage.

•Gently move your finger in and out. You will get a feel for what she likes by the noises she makes. Encourage her to communicate with you while you are doing it. She might want you to vary the finger action by moving your fingers back to the clitoris.

•Try putting two fingers in at a time. Again, more lube might be necessary. When your fingers are inserted in her, try to reach the g-spot by gently curving your middle finger towards her belly button. For some women, this is their special spot. Really encourage her to communicate with you so you don't continue if she feels any discomfort. Tell her to move your fingers to where she wants so she is gaining the most pleasure.

•Wiggle your finger around and see how she responds. Encourage her to guide you and tell you want she likes.

•While your fingers are in her, try putting your thumb on her clitoris so she has pressure on two pleasure points. You will know by her reaction what she likes and what not.

•Some things to remember. Don't just shove your finger in her and expect her to enjoy it. Get to know what she likes, this is through practice and communication. Remember to keep paying attention to the clitoris.

•Vary what you do. Quick and slow motions, soft and harder touches. Clitoris and G-Spot orgasms will occur through fingering when done properly.

•Finger sleeves are fun to try. The sleeve fit over your finger and the different textures of the sleeves means she gets different sensations in the vagina.

•Remember, communication is the key. Ask her what she likes, the experience will be much better if you tell each other what works and what doesn't.

by Suzie Harris
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Labels: finger, sex, vagina orgasm

Everybody’s got sexual fantasies—they range from tame (“Let’s try doggie style tonight.”) to risqué (“Let’s invite that cute bartender to join us later.”). Exploring each other’s fantasies can be a great way to spice up your sex life, as well as to get to know each other better and build stronger bonds of trust.
Everybody’s got sexual fantasies—they range from tame (“Let’s try doggie style tonight.”) to risqué (“Let’s invite that cute bartender to join us later.”). Exploring each other’s fantasies can be a great way to spice up your sex life, as well as to get to know each other better and build stronger bonds of trust. But what do you do when his fantasy (a threesome, for example) appalls you?

There are three elements that guys like about the idea of a threesome: The idea of seeing two girls, the idea of having multiple sexual activities going on at once, and the idea of watching other people get off while he watches.

Here are some ways you can make his threesome fantasy a reality without actually inviting a third party into bed with you.

To capture the first concept (your guy wants to see a lot of boobs), do the deed in front of a mirror, or even better, mirrors, so that when he looks up, he’s surrounded by beautiful women, multiple breasts, lots of smooth skin all around. Okay, maybe they’re all the same beautiful woman, but he gets to do it with all of them.

Next, turn out the lights and have him describe to you what he would want done to him if there were two women present. It may be somewhat of a physical challenge to pull off giving him a blow job and a foot massage at the same time, but the sexual pleasure he’ll get from your multi-tasking will reward your hard work!

Finally, to give him the delight of seeing others basking in sexual pleasure, give him a peep show of you pleasure yourself. You’d be surprised how sexually aroused a guy can get by watching you touch yourself.

by Erika Stanko
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Labels: masturbation, sex, sexual fantasies, threesome

The way in which you turn her on can take on several different approaches. Taking things slowly using both physical and emotional techniques will give her a huge rush. Below is a summary of the key elements of how to turn a woman on according to Dr Pam Spurr, author of Fabulous Foreplay.

1. The emotional factor.
Interestingly, women don't always see extended foreplay as purely tangible. Some women are indeed capable of physical arousal quickly, similar to men. However, for a slow build up, starting with an emotional approach and working your way into physical arousal is the best way for you to show her you're a real Italian stallion. Gaze deeply into her eyes when you first see her, it indicates the beginning of your extended foreplay, and is one enormous turn on. If you are dating someone you have met through an online dating site, try sending a provocative email to begin your extended foreplay, by the time you see her, she will already be wanting.

2. Sexual discovery.
Trends change all the time when it comes to our taste in music and clothing etc, but when it comes to sex, most of our methods are more than likely exactly the same - Time to expand! Orgasms, as sad as it sounds, don't 'come' quite as easily for long term couples as they once did. Try to concentrate on one particular act of foreplay, and always discuss new acts of foreplay and positions you can both try - sounds more exciting than playing the latest edition of scrabble.

3. The home straight.
Okay, well here is a little secret for the guys when things are nearing the finish line but your lady is only just out of the starting block. To bring yourself (the guys) back from the brink, have your lady press on your perineum and put pressure on your prostate which will help to delay the finish and will allow her to catch up. Guys will find their climax is more like a snail like finish instead of a frenzied last minute bolt of thunder.

4. The holy grail.
Mutual climax will only usually happen when things begin slowly, assume the missionary position, balance your upper body weight on her, then simply motion your pelvis as you have sex, slowly, so your pubic bone gently grinds her clitoral area, making her orgasm. This position helps the guy last until the end as this technique is best when sex is slow giving the guy more control over when he finishes.

5. A closing thought!
When you think you are approaching orgasm, concentrate on breathing out of your mouth, then breathe in through your nose, by practicing this technique during sex, men can also experience a full body climax similar to women.

by Matt Fuller
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Labels: arouse, foreplay, oral sex, turn on, women